Includes bibliographical references (p. 612) and index.

Beginnings -- Black Mountain I -- New York: autumn 1952 -- New York: winter/spring 1953 -- Black Mountain II -- New York: autumn 1953 -- On the move: 1954-1955 -- The first touring years -- The lean years -- The VW years -- The end of the beginning -- Connecticut: summer 1958 -- Europe, at last! -- "Success is dust!" -- Moving into the sixties -- Connecticut: summer 1960 -- Europe again: Venice 1960 -- Europe, continued: 1960 -- Troubling times: 1960-1961 -- Connecticut: summer 1961 -- Moving ahead -- Ups and downs -- Some ventures afield -- World tour / part I -- World tour / part II -- World tour / part III -- World tour / part IV -- World tour / part V -- Another beginning -- Full steam ahead -- Where from here? -- A professional company -- Some subsidy at last -- Mixed signals -- The beginning of the end -- Last chapter -- Postscript: New York: spring 2004.

This long-awaited memoir is an intimate chronicle of a crucial era in modern dance: the story of Brown's own remarkable career, of the formative years of the Merce Cunningham Dance Company, and of the two brilliant, iconoclastic, and forward-thinking artists at its center--Merce Cunningham and John Cage. From its inception in the 1950s until her departure in the 1970s, Brown was a major dancer in the company and part of the vibrant artistic community of downtown New York. She describes the exhilaration--and dire financial straits--of the company's early days, when composer Cage was musical director and Robert Rauschenberg designed lighting, sets and costumes; and the struggle for acceptance of their controversial, avant-garde dance. She explores Cunningham's technique, choreography, and experimentation with compositional procedures influenced by Cage. And she probes the personalities of these two men: the reticent, moody, often secretive Cunningham, and the effusive, fun-loving, enthusiastic Cage.--From publisher description.